I just watched some of this fiscal impact study on the proposed Lifestyle Center at the Planning and Zoning Public Hearing.

 I found it quite interesting, especially the comment regarding the proposed housing. Many people in this town, not all, are questioning the housing part of this proposal. Many people are concerned about the impact the apartments or townhouses or whatever they are now proposing, will have on the school community.

To temper this, the consultant for W/S Development pointed out that between now and 2025 88 percent of all the households in the United States will be childless, so a one or two bedroom apartment or condo would not have a severe impact on the towns educational system, citing these trends.

This consultant from Hamden, whose name escapes me at the moment, also claimed that in Cheshire, 54 percent of households are one or two persons.

I know the national trend is leaning towards women delaying having children and to back this up, I found an interesting article on this very subject. Take it as you will.

I remember years ago, doing a research paper for college, and one of my professors, (a woman) summing up our society very succinctly. She said “we live in a patriarchal society that disdains women and children.”

You know what, it sure seems that way at times. Anyone who has had children, has known that feeling from time to time. When something goes wrong, it seems all you see or all you get is fingerpointing. YOU the parent are wrong-It’s YOUR problem.

I really believe that being a parent today is harder, much harder and more stressful than it was years ago. Our state wants the parent to take control, but the exact opposite it seems has happened. The state has taken many of the parents rights away, especially when it comes to disciplining the child. If you even look at your child the wrong way today, you are in deep trouble.

Not only can we not correct the child, we can’t touch the child, can’t raise the voice. It is pathetic. I am NOT talking about parents being able to beat their child to a pulp, not at all, but a little correction now and then is not child abuse.

I remember when I went to St. Raphael’s School in Bridgeport many years ago. I had a nun as a teacher, Sister Beningna. To this day, people that had her as a teacher still talk about her, and believe it or not, it is good, not bad. The bottom line with Sr. Beningna, if you talked in class or put your head down, because you went to bed too late and were too tired to keep your head up and listen to her, she would take the eraser from the chalkboard, and fling it at you, hitting you right in the face. Everyone would just stare silently at you. You were embarrased to say the least.

But guess what, the next day, you did not DARE talk in class. You remembered. Now today, Sr. Beningna would be in jail for child abuse. But in our day, the parents backed her up. I mean, we did things we shouldn’t have, but we knew there was a line in the sand that we would never cross, because most of us, not all, respected and feared our parents. We knew there would be consequences, bad consequences, if we did not go to school, talked in class or God forbid, did not do our homework.

Sr. Beninga had the solution for that too. She would ask you why you did not do the homework and why if you were having problems that you did not ask her for help. If you plain out said you just did not do it, she would take her ruler and hit you on the palms of your hands.

Don’t think this did not have a lasting impact on myself and many others. It did. When I went to Southern Connecticut several years ago to get my Master’s I did not dare not do my homework!! I kept remembering Sr. Beningna.

And I got to class on time, and if I did get there late, I knocked on the door and apologized to the teacher. I couldn’t get over some students walking into class a half hour late, walking right in front of the professor as he/she tried to lecture.

 And this is a good one, eating food and drinking coffee in class. I was shocked. No respect for learning!!

St. Raphaels also had another famous teacher, Miss Benson. A friend of mine had her as a teacher in third grade. One day, this girl kept getting up out of her seat and running around the classroom. Well today, this would be ADD, she needs counseling, blah blah!!

Guess what Miss Benson did. She TIED the child to the chair. Now I know many of you will be upset with this. But guess what, the next day, this child sat still in her chair. This does not mean we ignore people with problems, no we do not. But it is funny, this girl today is a pediatric surgeon. Sometimes I feel our state legislators go overboard when they pass some of these laws. Many children, not all, feel they can get away with anything. I believe there are many children that do not know there are consequences to actions. It is sad.

The state is so afraid of a lawsuit, they practically have taken the authority out of parenting. It is like the state saying that no one can drive automobiles anymore because there are too many people getting into car accidents.

Parenting is difficult, we have our problems. But we like most parents, give it our best shot. If many in our society choose not to have children, that is their decision. But to try to pass off this apartment/condo townhouse situation at the proposed lifestyle center by trying to say that most people who will be renting or buying them will be childless and mostly DINKS (double income no kids) is premature and arrogant to say the least.